Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Ouch, Kevin Dujan, You've Snapped My Credulity!

Oh sweet heaven.

Do you know of an accurate list of cities and venues where “The Undefeated” is playing?

I am very eager to see the Sarah Palin documentary “The Undefeated” but it’s not playing here in Chicago.
There was, apparently, a one-time, unpublicized showing of the movie — for one screening only — that I didn’t hear about.  With no press or advertisement, hundreds of people still turned out for it.
Evidently, the film is packed wherever it is being shown…but it’s only a handful of theaters.
Does anyone know of an accurate list of where it is playing?

Here, Harvey Bilk, let me help you find a clue.

You know what? A little Chicago magazine ran a story on it.  You could have read about it there, but I doubt you've heard of the magazine; they're such a small, niche market publication.

Never heard of him, er, it!

Hey, I know some people who could help you! It's a website just devoted, believe it or not, to Sarah Palin! Amazing, I know.

This is almost as embarrassing as when C4P held their big meet-up in your home town, and you didn't show up. My, what you missed!

Please let me know if there are any other ragingly obvious CYA questions you need answered: "Oh, so this Paypal button puts money in MY bank account?"

Indeed it does! Say, Kevin, did you ever get the feeling that if we weren't enemies, we'd be best buds?

brought to you by Mrs. Polly of Snarkopolitan, the undead blog, providing guidance to the artlessly dishonest for lo these many eons. 


  1. There is this is called the Google..

  2. Mtilda, apparently the little fellow was eventually set right, for his "I did so TOO go to an actual event instead of just begging for money and blowing it off" post is up.

    If I were meaner, and less lazy, I'd put up an HB-sleuthing-style "Did anybody in Milwaukee see Kevin and his too-perfect-for-ten-thousand-words BF Justin at the Undefeated?" post. But it's too nice a summer day, with greenmarkets full of sweet July cherries out there.

    Sarah fans must be grateful to Kevin for the exhaustive frame-by-frame description of the film. How ever did he take that many notes at one screening? It's almost as if he combined every synopsis on the Internet into one giant, swollen, Undefeated burrito, with cheese.

  3. Anon as in What A Hoot:
    "It's almost as if he combined every synopsis on the Internet into one giant, swollen, Undefeated burrito, with cheese." Poetic, simply poetic, Miss Polly.

  4. Thanks, Anon. I blush.

    By the way, we are delighted to see (that would be me and Elsie, Lacey, and Martindale, my charmingly spurious collection of amusing chums--each with adorable and oh-so-individual quirks!) that Kevin's own Justin has taken up the pen for Hillbuzz, and, for a previously apolitical person who has zero interest, according to Kevin, in anything but the World of Warcraft, he writes like he's been a front-pager for years!

    And the way those two just can't stop referring to each other as "my boyfriend" as if they still both can hardly believe it after all this time is so awfully touching.

    Lacey says she had to wipe a tear after she read Justin's last piece, which is unusual, because she hates reading anything but horoscopes, which she pronounces "horrorscopes"
    and doesn't spell at all because she can't write!

    We're thinking of taking her to Lourdes, but it is so expensive, and Tillie and Martindale would love to come for support....

    ....did I say "Tillie?" I meant "Elsie," of course! Ha, ha, where's my head!

  5. Mrs. P --

    Isn't it nice to see that Justin shares Kevin's anti-Islam views? That Justin -- what a catch! A match made in heaven!


  6. Looks like Zac Efron, thinks like Pam Geller ... why, Kevin couldn't have come up with a better boyfriend if he'd made him up!

    So Kev's back, huh? I hadn't stopped by for quite a while since the place seemed to be collapsing into a spam dumpster, like those old Usenet groups used to when they stopped being moderated. Every thread was taken over by the same 2 or 3 people linking back to their own blogs. You could practically see the tumbleweed drifting through.

    But I see Kev's putting the place to rights and establishing his own inimitable style once again, because the first post I see is how Jesse Owens proved that FDR and Truman were WORSE THAN HITLER. Because Dems! Followed by a commenter who congratulates KD on his splendid research and analysis. Why yes, it does take a lot of effort to copy and paste straight from the Wikipedia page on Jesse Owens, thank you.

    But I won't believe that he's his own self until he calls Mrs. Obama a Klingon and compares her unfavorably to Mary Todd Lincoln. Then we'll know he's back.

  7. The newest of new lows for DuJan, defending Hitler over LBJ.

  8. ^^ FDR annoyed blonde monent

  9. Oooh, I see that Justin has been given Bridget's job of ripping off Wikipedia for the "Today in History" feature (while Bridget has become surprising loquacious on her own).

    I think it's easy to guess the origins of Kev's recent post on Jesse Owens. From Wikipedia's On This Day shoutout to Jesse for winning the 100-meter race to Wikipedia's page on Jesse being snubbed by FDR ... I can see why your commenter complimented you on your great "research and analysis", Kev!

    Well, I'm certainly relieved to see that Justin can read and write, or at least copy and paste, because Kevin's past descriptions of him made him sound mentally deficient. But I can't help wondering ... if Justin has been around all this time comforting Kevin in his time of need, and he is apparently literate, why couldn't he have dropped a note to poor long-suffering Bridge and Kath just to keep them informed?

  10. That is a puzzlement, Mary. But then, Robby and Panda and Sebastian never bothered contacting poor new co-blogger Chrissy when Kevin stuck her with all the responsibilities, and she had multiple health issues, too.

    As to the perfect dovetailing worldviews of K & J, well, bless their hearts. It isn't easy to find a like-minded partner who notices Hitler's kind little gestures, instead of just the big sig-heiley ones.

  11. He of now shame is now channelling Jebus to revamp a tried & tested theme of this most amusing of con artists.

    From this :

    To this

    If he spent less time attacking the gay community in order to worship a disabled child, he may find a partner who is not an imaginary Justin Beiber.

  12. Wow if I was in to professional limbo dancing I could not get lower than the newest attack on the gay community than Kevin, a supposedly gay man.
    if they
    I am guessing he went to Sidetracks as a newly minted Young Republican and got seriously confused by the description Chicken Hawk. He then failed at both possible definitions.

    I guess it is true, looking like Michelle Baachman is the worst insult you could give anybody. As a child who would want to look like her? Thus, our Kevin finds a need to publish the private details of those involved in running gay bars in Chicago and produce pictures of those going there (despite bans on private photography).

    i think it is time that Sidetracks left Kevin to his dreams about Justin Beiber and barred hom from entry so he could no longer use his hate site to out gay men for personal profit.