Friday, December 10, 2010

Mucking Around With Chicago Young Republicans: Hillbuzz's Prophet-Making Enterprise

Quelle Heel Dujan
Identities shielded out of sheer embarrassment for the subjects

The absurd little man who once selected Snarkopolitan for random target practice, Kevin Dujan, aka Harvey Bilk, Lord Of The Flies at $hillbuzz (on right, sporting air of mystery and overactive antennae), collected his first real scalp this summer. Based largely on the paranoid Palinophile's not very reliable say-so, his erstwhile buddy, the president of Chicago Young Republicans (above, in pink turban) (and a purported member of the Mittens Mafia of Romney thuggery!!!) was forced out, and now Harvey's clamoring for more scalps. And more.

Harvey's confabulatory antics are well known to Snarkopolitan's, and other, rightier blogs', regular readers, and I really wasn't going to revive this post, but since Harvey's wading back into the icky goo of Chicago politics, a little perspective might be a good thing.

Time was when Harvey and the turbaned fellow above were, as a Chicago magazine put it, "Unlikely Friends." Heck, as the tagline says, "They’d probably be enemies if they weren’t best buds!" Oh true, oh inarguable! The friendship, in fact, must have gone awfully sour.

First, let's consider this quote:

"Unbalanced, vainglorious, and vindictive, yet exceedingly charming and bisexually attractive, “The Prophet” was fired by the Murphy campaign"

"The Prophet?" What is this, an airport paperback? It is fiction, isn't it? Triply adjectival horrible fiction?

It isn't fiction? Well, in a way. It is another Dujanian brew of Gothic poli-romance junk fiction, with more unsubstantiated accusations by mysterious anonymous shadow figures than populate the crumpled contents of Danielle Steele's wastebasket. "The Prophet," Dujan insists, is in fact the very same young man with whom he is posed up there as the Beast With Two Fronts!

And, even better, the unnamed group that emails Hillbuzz (and a few other Chicago RW polibloggers, not all of whom are persuaded) calls itself, ludicrously, "Roxy Vanilla."

This blog's interest in the particulars of Chicago Republican politics is miniscule, but if political organizations are going to start tricking themselves out like drag queens and posting rabid, foam-flecked perorations that are to oratory what armpit-solos are to violin concertos, we're going to have a look. And looky here at this spectacular piece of wroth-waxing:

"Resign PROPHET, just resign. Resign before you are thrown out. Or

do you want to go out in some blaze of glory and burn the whole
house down with you? That is more your style isn’t it. Guess
what? There are more surprises coming. Do not even think you are
smart or you can maneuver your way out. You lost. Go. Quit.
Resign. Leave town. Get out. Put Chicago in your rear view
mirror. Or risk suffering the consequences.

Roxy Vanilla"

There was more. There was so much, much, more. But when you read that frothing, fantastic coup-de-grace, you know that Dujan must have fantasized about using it ever since he was a sprout bouncing on his parents' sofa, using a bathmat for a cape. Charming picture, until you realize it's a power-drunk thirtyish blogger aiming it at a 23-year-old former friend.

Hillbuzz's "Roxy Vanilla" stirs up an accusation against the head of the Chicago Young Republicans that had been handled internally, to the evident satisfaction of the original complainant, a year before. What Kevin Dujan does not mention in reheating this leftover is that he has a conflict of interest. In an October 5 post examining the whole mess, one Michael Volpe charges:

While Hillbuzz has been the driving force in raising the profile of this story, its proprietor, Kevin Dujan, failed to disclose a conflict of his own. He was a Hillary Clinton supporter who joined the CYR to help John McCain get elected. He stayed on after the election, but in June of 2009 he was considered for the position of fundraising director. ([!]--ed.)When that position went to another member, Dujan had a very public blow-up and wasn't seen by the group again.

Michael Volpe is a blogger for Andrew Breitbart's Big Government, which would not ordinarily recommend him, to put it delicately, to this scandalously lefty blog. But it's interesting to see a Breitbart writer take on another blogger who has been doing his best to flirt with Breitbart. Given the pounds-per-square-inch of hissy fits, melodramatic outbursts, and passive-aggressiveness in any Hillbuzz post, it's not hard to imagine the reality of the "very public blow-up."

Volpe's article also details the divisions in the CYR that found Dujan parted from his "best bud," which tidbit of course Dujan omits in his breathless pulp-thriller plot.

Just as Snarkopolitan doesn't want to become embroiled in Chicago Republican (or any Republican!) politics, this blog isn't going to pass judgement one way or another on the young man Dujan was so eager to accuse, except to remind all parties to consider this particular source.

But this is not the end of the story. It actually gets crazier.

The crux of the accusation against "the Prophet" is that he either tried to put some cheesy moves on, or attempted to restrain by sitting on the lap of, a young woman who didn't find him compelling, and wanted to leave, which she subsequently did with another woman who'd been there the entire time. But Dujan doesn't give his audience details; he simply calls the encounter, "attempted date rape:"

"Murphy was provided with a copy of the attempted date rape complaint filed against “The Prophet” by a young Chicago woman back in July 2009; Murphy received that complaint while he was still attempting a gubernatorial bid of his own, running with a staff comprised squarely of “The Prophet” and other young, relatively inexperienced 'Romney Guys'”

Date rape? That's horrible. There are obviously ugly political currents underlying this post, but that's a serious charge the writer's passing along there. So the segue seems a little abrupt when in the comments of the same post, the readers are treated to this:

Hillbuzz Says:

July 16, 2010 at 10:40 am
"We will give him this: he is cute. especially when he first wakes up in the morning and is all mussed hair mr. blondy sleepy needs his coffee bear."


WAIT....What?

Oh, jeez. Of course.

After all, this is Hillbuzz! So Harvey Bilk has just published allegations that "the Prophet" may be a rapist, and now, in the comments of that same post, he's calling him "mussed hair mr. blondy sleepy needs his coff---"
blechh blechh blechhh!

Excuse me.

But what is the proper response when somebody tells you:

a. So-and-so should be investigated for committing rape.
b. And I've slept with him! And he is like, so cute!

Blondy Sleepy Needs His Coffee Bear Is So Too Cute I am NOT a LOSER!
Harvey's loyal readers have had a little trouble digesting this one, and some couldn't quite fight either the nausea or the cognitive dissonance:

B***** Says:

July 16, 2010 at 10:51 am
"Oh, ICK! What a geek!! Ip, I agree.
If this is the best Old Moneybags can DO, that’s just sad!

The Boyz said he was cute so I was expecting somebody MUCH more studly.
Not in a million years!"


Now fights there within the bosom of Harvey Bilk a battle royal between his Sammy Glickitudinous desire to advance himself, and his preening vanity, which begs that his readers recognize that he does NOT sleep with sad icky "if this is the best old Moneybags can do" unstudliness. No! He sleeps with positively adorable date-raping man-candy, prompting this exchange:

Hillbuzz Says:

July 16, 2010 at 11:01 am
"He is nerdy cute. And a surprisingly good snuggler."

Reply
B***** Says:

July 16, 2010 at 11:13 am
"TMI…TMI…TMI…TMI!!!!!

Boyz, have mercy!
Must…find…brain…bleach"



B***** and other of Harvey's followers are conflicted any old which way; is B***** repelled by the idea that Harvey's called a rapist "cute?" Or is she unable to handle the fairly tame mental image of two men snuggling? Or is it those two men? As Hillbuzz's audience gradually turned from Hillarophiles to Palinophiles, the number of people comfortable with even mild homoerotica undoubtedly dropped. Where she fit in the continuum is hard to say.

In any case, BRAIN BLEACH, STAT!

Boasted friend to women, and boastful lover of their (and some men's, too!) sexual predator, Harvey Bilk is quite a piece of work.

It's not funny that either this man has done what he is accused of, or else he is the innocent target of a Hillbuzz smear campaign. Or that there's a greyish, boozy, furry reality not easily discernible to anyone, even the participants.

As always, Harvey buries his hapless readers in yards and yards of unrelieved block text, in post after post about Chicago Republican politics that this blog is not going to try to dissect. Frankly, except for hoping that there was in fact no date-raping going on, this blog's official position is not to care.

Except to note that the all the raping, closeted, covering-up miscreants seem to be part of that damnable gang of smiley-faced Utah-based mafia, the Mormons, whose bland menace is represented in the Buzz-reviled person of Mitt Romney. Mittens is running, putatively, against the Kwittin' Image herself, former half-Governor Sarah Palin. And that might have everything to do with why Harvey Bilk has pulled the plug on a beautiful, unlikely friendship, one that got the retiring Mr. Bilk a write-up, by name, with picture, half a year before he went thermonuclear at the idea that he had been "outed."

The retiring and anonymous Mr. Bilk might also have forgotten an interview he gave to a magnificently credulous CBS reporter. Bilk happily gave his real name, the name of his virulently nutty online screedatorium, Hillbuzz, and FAN-ta-sized designing a green wardrobe for his inamorata, Sarah Palin.

And by green, he doesn't mean organic bamboo rayon, he really means GREEN. Because dressing like a Lucky Charms logo is sure to quieten the voices of Enviro-fascists who are not in love with the Alaskan Frozen Cheezkake. Excellent job of branding, Harvey.

How could the Palin campaign ever get by without you.

**BONUS!!**

Harvey's "All the Kids Love It When I Read My Hatemail Post turned into a Wordle! (Click through for full-size) "I" "Me" "My!"
  Wordle: $Hillbuzz Thanksgriping!

Brought to you as always by Mrs. Polly of Snarkopolitan, the undead blog, who says, "Ask me about Tattoine Sarlacs! Go ahead, ask me!"

17 comments:

  1. LMAO! Well done as always, Mrs. P. Now, about those Tattoine Sarlacs...

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  2. Fabulous, Mrs. P. I too am imagining that very public blow-up. I'm sure they're still wiping the spittle off the walls.

    Given the sample of Buzzette reaction to Kevin's coy little confidences, you have to wonder if he was wise to drop the protective covering of the Boyz. A group of nameless cute gay dudes in the mold of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy can be titillating and un-threatening to these people. They're not sexual, they're .... flamboyant. But when the reality is poor little beetle-browed Kevin looking for love in all the wrong places, their reaction is going to be just like the reactions to Mr. Blondy Sleepy -- Ick.

    And I don't mean to take cheap shots at Kevin's looks -- although that is not a courtesy he extends to others -- it's just that he doesn't fit a stereotype that they're comfortable with.

    Although from what I can see, they're gone already. 1 lonely comment to his "breaking scandal" in the CYR? Gee, do you suppose people just don't care?

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  3. @Betty: Tatooine Sarlacs!

    I didn't even go into the vile, misogynistic names he called poor Beth Christie's cha-cha, which certainly never did anything to him.

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  4. Mary, your reference of QEFTSG is right-on. Buzzquarters sounded so glamorous and fun! Of course, when the real Fab 5 went to work on somebody, it was to help that person, however snarkily.

    The show did cheerfully advance the stereotype that gay men automatically have taste in clothing, which does not, as Kevin's dream of green Sarah splendor shows, necessarily follow.

    The few leftover readers at Hillbuzz certainly don't seem as interested in anything he writes as in the open threads, so the pattern of finding each other more useful than plowing through Kevin's egotistical three-thousand word screeds is repeating itself.

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  5. Great post Mrs. P. Note that in today's "hate mail" post, he takes another swipe at Susan from NH.

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  6. Thanks, A. Yep, it's time to beat the poor widdle me drum for funds again, and dragging that poor woman through the mud is always good for a few bucks.

    The "Hate Mail" post is complete bushwa, of course: I have never emailed him, or tried to comment on his site, since I know it would either be deleted or "edited" to say all sorts of nonsense, and I don't hate him, I pity him. And also wonder how he can ever earn an honest living again since he trashed his name with his Googleably unreliable behavior.

    He complains that "Occasionally, someone on the Left will take a creative writing course somewhere and feel inspired to up the ante slightly on this, incorporating all sorts of weird imagery into the attacks on me. "

    I'm flattered, really, Harvey, but all this whatever it is just happens naturally! And I simply describe what you do. And what you do is hateful; sorry about that.

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  7. Mrs. Polly, that was most informative. Thank you.
    I particularly appreciate that you supply 'links', so those of us who have been blissfully unfamiliar with the sordid details of this soap opera can read for ourselves.

    As a recovering HB-er, I remember the 'date rape' story very well. In fact...erm... I think I can help you with a few fine points:
    Q: "is B***** repelled by the idea that Harvey's called a rapist "cute?" Or is she unable to handle the fairly tame mental image of two men snuggling? Or is it those two men?"
    A: 1. Yes
    A: 2. No
    A: 3. Yes

    Dujan painted a picture of Mr. Rose as a sexual predator, but then repeatedly talked about what a 'hottie' he was. To most women I know, the predator thing more than 'cancels out' any physical or other assets, and many of us readers were conflicted and confused by the lovesick reveries of Mr. Dujan towards this creep.
    Then, when somebody finally tracked down actual photos of this alleged 'hottie', imagine our shock to discover that he was a world-class pencil-necked GEEK.
    Upon expressing our revulsion, Dujan launched into the 'TMI' details, which only raised the cringe factor.

    BTW, I love your graphics. Just brilliant.
    Also, we continue to appreciate the part you so generously played in helping reunite us 'honeys'.
    Cheers.

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  8. Thanks, "B," it was my pleasure! I've added a slinky link to you recovering Buzzers upstairs at "rightier blogs," but it occurred to me that, should any wanderer think Snarko is just a crazy lefty hate site, that in any Hillbuzz-oriented piece, it would be good to link Honeytrail, to direct other RefuBees to you. It looks like Hillbuzz is slowly finding new sources of revenue, aka new readers, and the cycle is going to repeat itself, so there will be a need for people to find out what happened to you Honeys.

    Thank you also for clearing up those "fine points." It's impossible to find anything to add to your apt description of what women feel about the attractiveness of sexual predators. Psychologically healthy women, anyway.

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  9. Anon 2, I do apologize for mis-interpreting the "Ick"-y reactions to Kevin's sweet, sweet memories of snuggling up to a molester. You are absolutely right, this was the most egregious aspect of his CYR bash-fest.

    And Anon 1, thanks for directing me to Kev's latest hate mail post. I share Mrs. P's sympathy for Susan of NH but I'm sure the sounds of the circus animals turning the corner into her street will give her plenty of time to call the cops.

    I noticed also: Kevin's Thanksgiving hostess's kids had time to make not only seasonal decorations for the dinner table but also artistic representations of his many enemies! So talented. Funny he never mentioned this in his Thanksgiving day post. I wonder if anyone drew goblins and trolls at that other Thanksgiving day dinner he attended at Buzzquarters HQ only minutes later.

    And Kevin has a boyfriend. He's 25, he looks like Zac Efron and he too likes to snuggle.

    Oh Kevin. I can see why you decided that lonely-club-haunter-from-whom-twinks-flee-in-terror was not a good look for you, but with all the hot young celebrities out there to choose from, why would you pick boring, Disneyfied Zac Efron as your fantasy squeeze? He's the next Freddie Prinze, Kev!

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  10. "I'm sure the sounds of the circus animals turning the corner into her street will give her plenty of time to call the cops."

    Now that's comedy.

    "Hello, officer? I wish to report a circus act. They're creating a bit of a disturbance. Could you send a car? Perhaps the mounted unit van? They have zebras."

    In regard to the double Thanksgiving, if Megan Fox's poor kids had to sit and listen to Uncle Kevin's "hate mail," I hope Santa brings them something extra for their patience. What an unpleasant holiday tradition!

    "Look, children, it's Uncle Kevin and he's brought more hate mail!"

    "Yayyy......(do we have to?)"

    Not so much Thanksgiving as Thanksgriping. I think he has got it mixed up with Seinfeld's Festivus tradition, The Airing Of Grievances, or as it's more commonly known, "Every Day At Hillbuzz."

    As to the instant perfect boyfriend, I just hope he exists. Perhaps he might sweeten somebody's disposition a trice.

    But good luck to him; relationships with Mr. Dujan do not tend to finish on an up note.

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  11. Re Kevin's boyfriend (named "Justin," which strikes me in itself as a lapse in imagination by Mr. duJan) mentioned by MaryRC. Let's not ignore the most memorable element in their "snuggle" tableau. Justin pleads with Kevin to read his copious hatemail to him -- in bed!!! Some kind of foreplay perhaps, or wondrous aphrodisiac -- I dare not speculate further. But attention must be paid. Whenever it comes time to do the countdown on Kevin's craziest moments in 2010, I nominate this for inclusion in the Top Ten.

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  12. Why, isn't that what snuggling is for? Mr. Polly likes nothing better than when we curl up with a warm Ovaltine and a good stack of hate mail. It's better than Spanish fly, I tell ya.

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  13. Mrs. Polly, thanks again. Also, other posters' comments and delicious snark are most appreciated.
    "...circus animals turning the corner..." A+

    Mrs. P, maybe I'm a tad dense, but could you please direct me to the "slinky link to you recovering Buzzers upstairs at "rightier blogs,"
    Thanks, again.
    B

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  14. B, 2nd para:"Harvey's confabulatory antics are well known to Snarkopolitan's, and other, >>rightier blogs<<, regular readers....."


    I hope those arrows line up. You're not dense; there's a lot of text, which makes it dense reading, and Blogger doesn't let me fold it up, as far as I know. But then, it's a free platform! I'm not complaining.

    BTW, you notice that I have ads, videos, and could easily have Blogtalk radio if I wanted to, all from here, for nothing? And sparkly stuff. FOR FREE!

    Thanks for stopping by! I've devised something else that might make it more comfortable for Honeytrailers and other Rightier folks: a sort of rating system for which posts will send Conservative readers for their Mylanta bottles and which won't: the Conservative 'Splodey Brain rating system.

    For instance, the new post up has a great, giggle-worthy Flash animation, but it was put together by a Liberal, and may be mildly irritating to your mental digestive tract. I have rated it at 3 Conservative 'Splodey Brains out of a possible 10.

    I'll have to come up with a graphic, somehow.

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  15. Then HuffPo is crazy?

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/07/28/jeremy-rose-resigns-cook_n_662270.html

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  16. Let me tell you the real story I worked with this douche bag Kevin Dujan during the Hillary CLinton camp. and went along with him on his crazy mccain shit. he even had us with "mad for mccain shirts on during halsted street days". he is an attention whore. he is probably making all this boyfriend shit up to sooth his savage breast. he lies about being a prude and can be seen sometimes in the dark room of jackhammers in the basement.

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  17. Anon., my sympathies to you and anyone who's had the misfortune to encounter the Duj, no matter what floor they're on. ;^}

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